I offer short presentations on the principles and skills
developed by Dr. Latham on a no fee or donation fee schedule for churches and
non-profit organizations located in Brevard County, Florida. For more information, please contact me by using
the form below.
Dr. Latham's Founding Principles
We reduce problem, behavior
and strengthen desirable behavior in children when we - as parents, teachers,
aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc. - positively reinforce a child's good behavior
rather than putting energy into attempting the correction of undesirable
behavior using aversive or negative processes. Thirty years of solid continuous
scientific research bears this out.
Seize
opportunities to have frequent positive interactions with your children.
There is no substitute for positive and pleasant interactions between parent
and child. When good behaviors are acknowledged and praised, children tend
to have a positive reaction and then continue with the good behaviors.
Clearly
establish and communicate your expectations. Do your children know
exactly how you expect them to behave? Do they know what is unacceptable? If
children have a clear, working understanding of your expectations and
understand the consequences of meeting or not meeting them, they are more
inclined to behave appropriately.
Clearly
establish the consequences for compliance and noncompliance. Before you
have an incident with a child that calls for disciplining, it's best to
already have set consequences. Doing so allows parents to keep their cool
and let the consequences do the talking. Once established, stick to your
plan and don't be distracted by argument, reason, or emotion.
Ignore
behaviors that do not threaten the basic quality of life, limb, and property
(which include most unacceptable behaviors). Most inappropriate
behaviors are of no consequence - they may be irritating, but not worth
getting upset over. Usually if left alone, these behaviors will go away on
their own. By getting upset over them, you are simply reinforcing the
behavior with the attention you're giving to it.
Attend to
inappropriate behavior in an unemotional, precise, and direct way. If a
child can learn to behave inappropriately, he can learn to behave
appropriately. The key to dealing with inappropriate behavior is to let
consequences do the talking. This way the parent is no longer to blame...
the behavior is.
Do not
question a noncompliant child about his behavior or ask him to explain his
inappropriate behavior. Inviting verbal exchange about a bad behavior
tends to be counterproductive as doing so simply calls attention to the
problem you're trying to solve. Ask questions only if you need information
for problem-solving, otherwise you're just blowing off steam.
Use the
inappropriate behavior of one child as a cue for you to attend to the
appropriate behavior of other children. Appropriate behavior can be
reinforced by the attention given to it. If you give praise to one child for
his good behavior while ignoring the bad behavior of another, the child
behaving inappropriately will start behaving appropriately in order to
receive that praise.
Smile and
laugh, talk and touch - a lot! Positive interactions are important to
let your children know you love and appreciate them. Affection given to your
kids - hugs and kisses, appreciative notes, smiles, etc. - goes a long way,
and creates a positive, loving, nurturing home environment.
Assess
behavior analytically and treat it clinically. When disciplining
children, learn to gather data about the problem first and let that help you
solve problems. When disciplining is necessary, proceed cautiously, be
objective and calm, and take note of what's happening.
I highly recommend Dr. Latham's book, The
Power of Positive Parenting. Click on "Buy Now" to purchase with
your credit card.
Suggested retail price is $24.95.
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